Masters of the Air

    I found the worst Canadian point of entry for getting hassled is Niagara Falls Ontario - particularly if you get a 20 year old Chinese boy as a customs guy. They actually like messing with kids for some reason. Canada Customs is all diversity hires nowadays - they all like taking a crack at white people.


    The exception is Quebec, it's all white French Canadians (usually women), and they are laid back and nice (they don't have a beef with Americans).


    Customs at the Montreal Airport are the easiest ever. The downside is there's like 1 place to eat : Subway lol.

    Quote from slamfire

    I found the worst Canadian point of entry for getting hassled is Niagara Falls Ontario - particularly if you get a 20 year old Chinese boy as a customs guy. They actually like messing with kids for some reason. Canada Customs is all diversity hires nowadays - they all like taking a crack at white people.


    The exception is Quebec, it's all white French Canadians (usually women), and they are laid back and nice (they don't have a beef with Americans).


    Customs at the Montreal Airport are the easiest ever. The downside is there's like 1 place to eat : Subway lol.

    I’m taking the wife to see the falls from the Canuck side later this year. Should I not go through customs near there? I have a low threshold for bullshit, don’t need an international incident.

    Quote from Razer

    I’m taking the wife to see the falls from the Canuck side later this year. Should I not go through customs near there? I have a low threshold for bullshit, don’t need an international incident.

    Luck of the draw... Chinese guys are the absolute worst of the worst. Avoid them if you can (much easier said than done). Rest of them, usually not a big deal. If you don't have kids with you (esp really young kids), the Chinese guys are less of a problem. They like to rile the kids up in an attempt to anger/provoke you (I've had that experience many times at Canadian airports). In Niagara they are a lot easier if you walk across the bridge there (like park in Niagara Falls NY). That is a A LOT of fucking walking though - you'll walk several miles so avoid unless you are in good shape and have the right shoes.


    When I had trouble with a Chinese guy at Niagara, it was because that morning I was in Canada, starting in Ottawa, and crossed the border at Messina NY. I then drove to Niagara Falls NY, and crossed back into Canada there. He knew (via computer) that I had crossed a few hours earlier (Canada to USA), and that was a MAJOR MAJOR point of contention. He was like :


    "WHY U CROSS NU YOKE!?! WHY U NO DRIVE OTTAWA TO TORONTO TO NIAGARA?!?!?!"


    Basically, why didn't I just drive on the 401 highway, from Ottawa to Toronto to Niagara Falls. Easy answer. Toronto. On the US Side, it's a nice highway, and it's absolutely deserted. Just one straight line, going high speed the whole way, zero traffic. THe highway is way overbuilt because of Fort Drum. Go on the Canada side, and you have to go through all of Toronto - think crossing through New York City. It adds at least 1-2 hours to your trip. The highway is shittier as well.


    He then called me a (fucking) liar - going Canada way much fasta !. I just calmly told him "Nope, you don't know what you are talking about". He just went absolutely red faced apeshit, and I just remained calm, and corrected every wrong thing he said. Not smugly, not angry, just ice cold calm - serene actually. That made him get madder and madder. In the end nothing much he could do, I'm sure we were on Camera. I told him when I left to "Have a secure day". I love saying that, it always freaks people out.

    One time I cleared Canada customs in Toronto airport, and right after going through - like 30 feet behind their booths, I bent over and tied my untied shoelace. Nobody was there - no lines, nothing. I had a cop come over, and discreetly he told me,


    "Hey man, you DO NOT WANT to do that..."

    "Do what?"

    "Put your bags down and tie your shoes in the customs area"

    "Really why ? I already cleared customs, there's no lineup"

    "Because those guys are fucking territorial assholes, and they take doing that as a supreme insult and challenge to them - as if you took a piss on their turf".


    I thought that was really funny - so did the cop, but he was warning me as a nice gesture, at what utter assholes they are - like he can't stand them etc.


    You're dealing with emotional sociopaths with Customs people usually. They are drawn to jobs like that because of the power it gives them - and they can get back at the world. Same type of people who would gravitate to becoming prison guards.

    Quote from Razer

    I’m taking the wife to see the falls from the Canuck side later this year. Should I not go through customs near there? I have a low threshold for bullshit, don’t need an international incident.

    Go thru your car and belongings several times to make sure there are no guns, bullets, mags...empty holsters....etc, ANY of those things will surely end your day

    Well respected man about town doing the best things most conservatively

    Like 1

    I don't understand? What is it that is an insult to them? I don't get it.

    Quote from slamfire

    Because you're showing casualness in their house. They want you to show fear. They want to be feared. They want you to shuffle out of there fast, and chastened.

    You should do it again. Tie your shoes and then turn around while slowly kind of stretching your arms and yawning and then look them in the eye and grab your junk like Michael Jackson and then walk away

    I'm sure there's all kinds of shit you could do - like after you clear, stick around and take a loudmouth phone call on the cell phone - like be all dramatic and self important - like all present are pieces of shit and you're the star of the show.